Saturday 30 March 2013

Second best


I am a second born and is the only one with a good flare in writing. My head is with sets of silly ideas and weird values, developed over the five years in boarding school, that is what papa thought of me.
My mom was from the same boarding school as I was (but she is more serious in nature) is a typical lady of her generation, with pre-conceived ideas of how things ought to be but more liberal than some other moms I knew. She is a hard set in her ways, much as I wanted to break away from.
There was nothing more I craved from her than her respect during all my growing up years. While I declared my independence from her expectations, in every decision I made, I would always be looking over my shoulder to catch a glimpse of what she thought. Her approval meant everything to me and her disappointment broke my heart a million more times than it did hers.
Mom was from a middle class background; my grandmother was a primary school teacher, my grandfather a primary school headmaster. She has always been her own woman (independent in judgment or action) – earning her stripes by purely proving her intelligence; gaining respect from her scholarship offered during her uni years. She earn First Class Honors – an achievement each of us, her children, strive to emulate.
I remember falling asleep on the sofa while waiting for her as she writes up yet another research paper that she will present at yet another research conference. We – her kids – see how hard she works and strive with lots of effort puts in during her pursuit of knowledge.
I was thinking to myself, one day after I get my PhD then I will be able to walk beside her as an equal by academic measure but I know, no matter how far I go I’ll still fall short. And for once, coming in second best don’t matter all that much to me.
I miss you mom..

Friday 29 March 2013

Would you pay?



If my life was for rent, who, in their right mind, would pay?”
You are free to interpret the phrase “life for rent” as you wish, but my train of thoughts were inspired by the Dido single which was titled by the phrase in question. I’m posting the lyrics down below, perhaps to add a bit of seasoning to today’s food for thought.

Life for Rent
by Dido
I haven’t really ever found a place that I call home
I never stick around quite long enough to make it
I apologize that once again I’m not in love
But it’s not as if I mind
that your heart ain’t exactly breaking
It’s just a thought, only a thought
But if my life is for rent and I don’t learn to buy
Well I deserve nothing more than I get
’cause nothing I have is truly mine
I’ve always thought
that I would love to live by the sea
To travel the world alone
and live my life more simply
I have no idea what’s happened to that dream
’cause there’s really nothing left here to stop me
It’s just a thought, only a thought
But if my life is for rent and I don’t learn to buy
Well I deserve nothing more than I get
’cause nothing I have is truly mine
If my life is for rent
And I don’t learn to buy
Well I deserve nothing more than I get
’cause nothing I have is truly mine
Ohh.. my heart is a shield and I won’t let it down
While I am so afraid to fail so I won’t even try
Well how can I say I’m alive
If my life is for rent
And I don’t learn to buy
Well I deserve nothing more than I get
’cause nothing I have is truly mine
If my life is for rent
and I don’t learn to buy
Well I deserve nothing more than I get
’cause nothing I have is truly mine
’cause nothing I have is truly mine
’cause nothing I have is truly mine
’cause nothing I have is truly mine

where was my fault in loving you with my whole heart



It’s a glorious Friday morning sunshine, coupled with a cool breeze that reminds me it is  spring now.. The skies are blue and clouds are far and few in between.
I made a breakthrough in my data analysis last night. I feel as if there is something concrete to work on today and I woke up a bit earlier than usual, and managed to go through my paces without rush before our first meeting at 6am. “
“A football game to look forward to tonight” said Brian
 I don’t quite care. Just need to run around and kick things.
Not a bad start to end the week. What could go wrong?  
For now, I just want to bask in the glorious spring sunshine.

Wednesday 27 March 2013

DPSSD....you got it all....



I have confused enough people into thinking that I have leadership qualities. Evidence is people have voted me into positions of power and the idea of me actually running for office got me thrown into the ring but not seriously
 I don’t possess the necessary qualities to be a leader. One of my teachers got it quite right when she said that I was neither a leader nor a follower. I was just too lost inside my own head.
But this has not stop me admiring other’s in leadership. What I admire most is the ability of people in power to be ‘just like one of us’. There are many stories in history that depict this and one is Umar ibn Abd Aziz, the Umayyad caliph who was known to denounce riches and wandered through the night as a commoner to witness the pain of his subject.
 Henry V in the Shakespeare’s wandered among his soldiers in disguise to boost their morale.
Recently, during a development course in UTM campus I bumped into one of our OC walking down the stairs of the student halls where they were put up for the night.
“Are you staying here as well?” I asked.
He smiled and said, “Yes, I got a room beneath you. I thought I’d check out the student accommodation for myself.”
 I would not have batted an eyelid if he has choosen to be put up in the cozy hotel down the road, but his insistence on being just like one of us, win him my respect.
I am too used to bigwigs putting themselves and family first and blatant misuse of benefit whenever the opportunity arises. 
When was the last time your top guy opted to slum with the marhaens?

Untukmu sayang....



Dearest,
Never in my wildest dreams did I think I would meet and you twisted my heart with a simple ‘hi’ during World Cup July nearly three years ago.
You are unique with intriguing qualities that drive my desire for you far beyond any imagination…. I wanted to bring your child into this world, share everything, offer all my love unconditionally, and grow old with someone to one day reminisce of the years we shared. Just the thought of offering my total heart and spending my life brings these incredible emotions I have never experienced before.
The worse day of my life was letting you slip away because the timing just was not right for either of us, but second chances do not come too often in life.
Love, hugs & kisses,

Warkah cinta utntukmu



My dear DPSSDCptDr, 

WE love people in different ways and for different reasons, depending upon how they have touched OUR life. Love is a very powerful word and can describe a multitude and magnitude of feelings.
The love I have for you is strong and enduring and will stand the trial of time. I am blessed that you have become a part of my life. I want to share in your joys and sorrows. I want to be your everything. You are everything to me. You are everything I do.
 You see and bring out the best in me. You are the one I want to share everything with - my thoughts, hopes and dreams. Thinking of you makes my heart feel full. You are such a source of inspiration for me. I will forever be indebted to you for all you have brought to my life. 
So, to repay you, I promise you my heart and all the love in it for the rest of my life....
Love always,

Tuesday 26 March 2013

SBP or MRSM?


 SBPs and MRSMs and how they rank in the SPM examination rankings during my schooling years and it was not a stopper for how good my school is. I have been there and I know it was not all it’s cracked up to be. Believe it or not, during my SPM year, we managed to break a record of major proportions by not getting a 100% SPM examination pass.
Officially, (my SPM examination year) on the SBP list, we are ranked 4th. Overall, if we were to include all schools – private and MRSM – we are ranked 7th.Which is still okay, since we beat TKC and SSP… 

STF’s results are impressive to a certain extent – Maths got 100% all A1, and 134/149 students got A1 for Add Maths. That is, of course, testimony to how good the rote learning system is, I think. I have long been a strong opponent to rote but at the end of the day, it is that which gets results people wanted..

I did gloat a bit since we were a bit higher in the rankings than TKC and SSP; but that’s just sibling rivalry. They gloat at me, on others I gloat at them. It was funny because now we had nothing to do with the achievement – so where really was our right to gloat? But it’s a long-lived rivalry tradition – and it exists in many things – school bands, debate competitions, whatever really, for which there are clear rankings.
As for the MRSM issue in those years –  they have come out tops in the real rankings. It’s just that the PKP MRSMs – for which only students with all A’s at PMR level can enter – are much talked about, they are good schools. But so are other MRSMs who achieve comparable results too and these other MRSMs work with the second or third smartest group of post PMR students. Might be  the cream post-UPSR students were taken by the SBPs?
These other MRSMs are also spotlighted, because they got grade B milk with which they made grade A cheese, where as the PKPs got grade A milk, which, usually, although not always, is easier to mold into grade A cheese.
 It’s easier for SBPs and normal MRSMs to get good grades because they already have the cream post-UPSR examination, easier for MRSM PKPs because they get the cream post-PMR examination, but not such an easy ride for all the day schools, because the maverick few can upset the whole equation.
Let us leave it at that. There are more interesting things out there than SPM results and rankings. Like the story of an Indian student who hung herself for getting 2As instead of 6, and an enraged teenager ramming a car at the courthouse in Perak out of frustration due to his poor results a few years back.. Minority cases but an unhealthy precedent when for some, there is nothing in life but examination.







Monday 25 March 2013

Golf?


I chanced upon an old friend by accident and we spoke about the weather, Perak, Gaza, and ultimately the conversation was steered towards a common interest: futsal.
I told him its been a year we played futsal as a team. I been thinking about starting tennis again,
“What about you?” I asked. “Most of the old gang had left, where do you get your fix?”
He smiled, almost wryly and said, “I don’t play anymore.”
“Oh no?” I was quite surprised.
“Yeah.. these days.... I.. hmm.. I.. err.. I play golf now,” he grinned.
I swear a part of me died inside. A little bit.

Sunday 24 March 2013

Our first duo evening drive...


I turned 29 in early March. And I am now years away from the time when I see myself as that of a fresh-faced 17 year old, somewhat cynical but ready to take the world on her own big stride. Suffice to say, in between those twelve years I have wrestled and grappled with the cards that life has thrown at my face. There had been times I have emerged victorious which are far and few in between. Lesson that I didn’t learn while I was in ST* : You never get what you want. You may think you have gotten it, but the packaging looks better than what is in the inside.
There are moments which I forgot to capture by heart, pictures I forgot to single out, love ones I forgot to write to, phone numbers I forgot to ask for. I remember vividly my life in high school. Running around in my white and blue uniform, juggling 9 unrelated subjects which to me was the greatest burden alive ( I still think it is) and my uni life in Sydney..
But most of all, our duo evening drives right now allows me to think about things I forgot if I ever try given a serious thought about them. Those things I don’t want to let go which keep swimming in my mind of past dreams, gone by inspirations, elapsed ambitions, my innocence lost, and a brutal and savage occurrence which I dread to reel back .
We stopped at a traffic light near a school. A group of primary students are lined up in the school field, looking restless as they listen to the headmaster droning on and on endlessly. I smile to myself.  They are all images playing tricks in my mind on a late Sunday evening…
He: you ok?
Me: Yes. Thank you.

Saturday 23 March 2013

It's not about what you like....



Politics came late into my life. For most of my teenage years, I chose to be in the state of ignorance is bliss when it came to governance. It was not hard to be complacent, then. BN were in power, had always been in power and will always be in power, or so said me as a 16 year-old girl.
I remember then when daddy trying to persuade me to flick through the political stories in the dailies delivered to our home when I was home during the school holidays. I told him what I think of politicians...
 “They’re like kindergarten spoil brats, fighting over the pettiest things but doing so little for the people.”
He retorted by saying perhaps one of the most important phrases I uphold in my life since...
 “It’s not about what you like or what you don’t like. It’s about knowledge, and knowing is better than not.”
I blame his statement for my collection of books on subjects as diverse as post colonialism to the history of football; on authors ranging from Ibn Batutta to Plato. I hate some of the stuff, but I still think I should have a working knowledge of them. Know thy enemy.....

In a matter of days it will be election week I intend to make mine count when polling booths open if I am still around…..

Friday 22 March 2013

He is from killerbatch



I am an interesting and active Facebooker (dorg kata) and has listed nearly 160 over friends (ckit jer) and I am closest to nearly 15 of them mostly from killerbatch.(boley jadi adik angkat tak?) 
It is my status updates that makes me an interesting person (perasan). I wrote about things constantly.
I read all kind of stuff and literature is like low fat wheat bits that I gobbled down my throat.  

I could read Malay language in Arab alphabets well.
I read Karl Marx along side the Buddhist scripture and along side the Bible.

Recently, I have come to love reading quotations of Buddha and the Dalai Lama. I find it a peaceful insight compared to all the other heavier stuff I read

My Mum once asked me if I am going to convert to a Buddhist.

NO.  

Maybe because sometimes I wear Mala beads on my left wrist and this triggered an 'oh-my-God-my-kid-is-going-to-be-a-frikkin-freethinker' . Such an alarm.

I have a good job and I am not a serial killer is enough to justify that  I am the product of a good upbringing.


I was brought up in a Malay Muslim setting with strong traditional belief. The significant here is, it is like living with a form of invisible restrain glued on myself as an individual. My place as a woman was preconceived for me by a group of people I never cared about. I learned that God is an entity to be feared, instead of loved and at a  very young age... I truly believed that just by saying 'babi', gives me a ticket to hell.

Ditto is only to camouflage my anger of a photo I saw in Fbook.


Today I did something that I should have done a LONG time ago.
Apedia Am?

Goodbye my love....



 I feel like I could break someone’s neck right now.

Imagine the shit that I have to go through today….
 At this moment, everything pisses me off.
Good bye my friends
Good bye DSSPACp.Dr Am. (hehehehehe)
Good bye Fion…

I wish I could strangle my own neck.
Sob,

Write a bit each day...



I wrote a lot in here. Life is becoming more stressful and I needed an outlet. Maybe it is a diversion tactic. Maybe it is procrastination-on-speed. Wutever….
At work when deadlines are no longer looming left right and center, I have more time to vent but time for sleep is equally less. So why am I not writing? Everyday words swim in my head, swimming freestyle. ;)
When I started writing, I focused on the premise that I am writing for me; be damned about others. I found real pleasure in writing. Thanks to my sifu and partner in crime. I sometimes read other blogs too. And this was when it all started and I ended up writing nothing.
So I have set my markers and I decided to go back to all things basic. Write a bit each day, or other days. Be damned what others say.
This is my bit for today folks.

My empty head...



Sometimes I think there is a pot of ink inside my head, which diminishes drop by drop with every word that I wrote. And if I use that pot of ink to write anything that cross my mind would that leave me with an empty head….   
I’m having trouble remembering how to relax—how to fade out when my life gets a little too intense. Because that’s what I had realized: writing is and always been an escapism for me. If I am unable to write, how am i to escape? Where can my mind rest?
And reading other people’s work will help for a while. How long will my subconscious be satisfied by these silly distractions? I will end up waking up in  cold sweats, haunted by never ending nightmares?. 
I guess I will therapeutically heal myself  by reading more materials. I finished reading two books in a week: The Perks of Being a Wallflower (heart-wrenching), and All Quiet on the Western Front (even more heart-wrenching). Instead of my morning routine of writing, I read. I read and I read and I read, hoping that the creative inspirations of others might inspire something in me. So far, it is still at zero.
Slow or lack interest in writing is a natural repercussion of lack of reading. Last year I read so much less than I did in prior years.  And it’s been a while since anything stirred me. Nothing floods the blogosphere with entries more than broken hearts.
Yes you can quote me on that.

Thursday 21 March 2013

Who knows...


I got hooked up  for writing after spending a whole day not doing much. But I did  attend to the odd chore in between reading the newspapers and other stuff lying around the living and my brain has just about had enough put into it for it to want to puke right now. 

Friday night then will follow by a lazy Saturday affords you that ounce of extra stamina that comes with the knowledge that you still have Sunday ahead of you. If you are still breathing by then.  But maybe you’re in for an extended edition tonight, who knows......

Good night peeps.

Roti...satu!


Rasa kosong......
 Void........
 Macam tak ada apa apa........
Emptiness.......
Perasaan roti kosong bila dia menjeling ke arah roti telur dan roti sadin di kanan dan di kirinya.....
Begitu la.......

Me and a dog name Boo....



I found some old tapes I made when I was still at school from a box I took from Shah Alam. Home for the two of us, me and my eldest brother when we were lil but the house was sold a few months back. It saddened me. The same sad feeling I had when pa sold our home in Ipoh 3 years back.
Back to the old tapes….some of them were compiled by accident – a series of songs I’d liked at a specific point of time, recorded from the radio. Not many were ‘clean clear’ copies because there’s always a voiceover somewhere in the back ground, which really annoyed me then. Now they are just capturing  the spirit of the long lost times.
When I got A1s for my PMR examination, the parental units had to pay up – the deal was RM50 per A1 obtained. Hahahaha….. I was trained as a capitalist then. I manage to get near the RM400 and the amount I secured allowed me to buy an Aiwa radio with both a CD and a cassette deck.  It was a joyous homemade mixtape heaven for me then..
The mixtape has, of course, evolved to mix CDs and now playlists. I don’t mind playlists, but with me they tend to grow exponentially. What all mixtapes boil down to, when you’ve stripped all the stories away, are a collection of songs that you want to listen to.
 A playlist is just a couple of songs I quite like at a particular moment in time, and I want to listen to them frequently enough; not too frequently enough to have it on loop, but at the same time frequently enough to not have to wait more than 45 minutes or so to listen to it again.
For the first time today I listened to this song posted on my fbook wall. My heart bleeds....

Friday 15 March 2013

The other side of the midnight....



I find observing peeps is interesting as much as they find it interesting to observe me. 

To most of them my life is a super cool and interestingly filled with so much action. I constantly fly from one to the other end of the globe. Quoting Billi bong bong… …."Mama flies to work by planes. Then she flies in a chopper to the middle of the ocean. She stays and works there for many months and I will miss her for many months too…”
Some even thought that my life is all about nonstop parties and dating one guy after another. Urrgghhh

The truth is, my life is plain, uninteresting and rather boring.. 
I work almost 24 hours every day (which sounds rather ... sad) and 99.5% of my colleagues are hunky males. I hardly had a lady for a roommate and I have to share the same bath and toilets with the guys.. And I eat boring healthy food, low fat yoghurt. vegie curries, quinoa and wholemeal bread. 

Mayo makes me puke so is fish, meat and all their by products. 

The only thing that I guess I am making waves with is the fact that I love bikinis, the sun, the beach when on vacation with my family on remote islands.  
I am actually proud to announce that I have a boring life...

The only thing exciting about me would be my shoes, dresses, bags and my growing book collection.

(I am a traditionalist. I still buy paperbacks and refuse to use the Kindle that was given to me as a present two years ago. Unless I decided to go travel a lot during my 3-6 months vacation.)

I used to think that one of my best friends was an arrogant ass and little did we expect that we would be best friends.

The thing is, whatever kind of perspective that we decided to portray on a certain individual, 95% of it turned out to be wrong.

Thursday 14 March 2013

In all sincerity



For my recent birthday, I asked him for crystals since I love precious weird stone and in the spirit of experimentation I am anxious to give it a try.

His mom is an ardent believer in crystal healing and on his request she took me to a holistic healing center that sells crystal with an expert consultation. 
(kepercayaan yg boleh membawa kpd syirik?)

In my blurry and sleepy state (side effect from a medication) I was drawn to a pendant a combination of Rhodonite and Morganite (that is what the expert told me).

 

I guess…my being drawn to it.. meant that it was calling out to me… "Nina….Nina”
(bayangkan kamu sedang menonton filem Patung Cendana.... hahahahaha).

I was asked ealier...." what do you want the crystal to do for you?." 
(Hahahahahahaha……soklan bodo)

Anyway……
(aku jawab dengan bodo)

……. so I said “I want to find peace of mind because I was so mentally stressed. And...
love... ."                  


The expert said… "because it is a pendant, it will help in giving you peace and love, as it is worn on the heart chakra." 
(Hahahahahaha....aku gelak lagi dlm hati)

 In case you have no idea what new age holistic  pseudoscience, chakra or aura  I am talking about :

….. so 'chakras and auras' are words that are all too familiar to yoga believer. It is believed that an aligned chakra is the best state for a yogi or anyone….in fact



**But in all my sincerity, there's no harm in wearing it and in the spirit of experimentation I thought they are so lovely and holding them with nice warm thoughts can't be all that bad.






In all seriousness....


In all seriousness, having kids had always been in my agenda. 

In all seriousness......I am 29. (Thanks to those who sent me well wishes on my recent birthday. I love uol heaps!) 

I love playing with' kids. I adore them and I love fooling around with them too. 

But do I want to have more kids?

I.... don't know. 

Maybe as a woman, I might want to. But as a person, I have my reservations. 

I have seen how people change just by being in a relationship. Then... having a kid... is...upsetting??? 

Life changing would be an understatement... 

Why do we  want to have kids?. I am not wrong when I think of these.....
 
Westerners have kids because... they just do. Asians breed because they want the kids to live in guilt and never ending gratitude that they were here because of them 'parents'. (bila ibu/ayah da tua wajib menjaga mereka). Africans reproduce because... well they can't get condoms. 

So... you changed for the sake of a change in your marital status and you changed you have to change more when you have kids... so what happen then?


Hmmmm.......(dalam melayani pemikiranku yang semakin sempit!!)

Wednesday 13 March 2013

A lil brain dead



I had that sudden need to actually, cry. To cry my eyes and heart out. I didn't have anything specific to cry about, but, I was, all of the sudden, choked up.

Can't really understand why all these........and I stopped by the road to nowhere and cried.

My tears streaming down my face, not knowing the actual reason for crying.

 I paid my bills, did French pedicure with his mom and I had a whole cheescake and a box of chocolate

Chocolates fix everything.


It was definitely not tears of sadness, because I was not ... sad.

But I was numb. I felt stuck, I felt like I am in a cocoon of numbness.

I need to go swimming. I need to zone out.


I need to clear this... numbness out of my system.


Jaga....
Bila kau pulang.....
Pastikan kau otak paling ceria....
dan aku disini....


Masih menuggu... 
tiada ber Otak.