When it's time, You just know it...

It’s been nearly 18 months ago, he stands nearly  six foot tall, well rounded body, walks with a hunch, greenish deep penetrating eyes he looks a bit like the good looking Edwards. (I hope he won't stumble upon this post walla!).

Opening up wells, oil rates, gas oil ratios, water cuts, sand amounts and tubing pressures are common topics typical drillers like him would usually talk about. We were paired twice and each time when I reported back that a new well was not flowing he would generously gave me an ear to ear smile while batting his long lashes eyes looking so handsome. .

Those days when the wells weren't behaving as they were supposed to, I would consult him and his advice and remedies would never failed me. It worked all the time. It was so easy to communicate with him.With his vast background experience in the production side of the industry he is a gem to the company he works for.

Only those with high capacity to endure waiting, delays, or provocation without becoming angry or upset will know how to appreciate the meaning of the word patience when dealing with stubborn wells. It teaches calmness and composure since we can only assume the well's conditions from it's never complete dataset, and we had to figure out how best to entice natural flow from the wells. 

I am mostly impatient, and  waiting agitates me and I am most fortunate to be mentored by someone as patience, experienced and as special as him… well wise, but also, life wise. 

On one of the trips back to shore, we were in the same boat. Usually when I am on a boat I love to stay at the outer deck, however hard the sun rays seemed to penetrate my skin. He was on deck too, smoking.He saw me and  took a seat beside me. In between the puffs we talked about life, about my company, the government and of course Leodi.

 “How old are you Nina?”

I told him my age. 

“Why aren’t you married yet? Most girls your age would have wanted to settle down and have children whenever possible. I was told you were always on a same project where he is the head”

I looked at him straight eyed, and asked back, “What if I don’t want to settle down with him?”

To which he chuckled. I’d say he was expecting me to say something about my relationship with Leodi…everyone assume we are having a concrete and tangible relationship but no one has directly asked me.  He drew in another puff, and said sagely, “In matters of the heart… you must not rush. Take your time babe. When the time comes which will definitly comes and it doesn’t matter if its right now or a long way down the road, when it’s time, you just know.”

Here I was, getting the pep talk I’d expected from my daddy, but hearing this one out in the middle of the ocean from this wise and experienced drilling master in a momentous time we shared together.

The sun was trying its best to burn a hole through my skin. There we sat together, he is so good looking and looks as sage as ever.

I missed that calm, handsome face. Those calm and assured ways when he talks is so comforting. I would have blown my top if others were to ask me personal life questions but with him, it was like talking to a good friend. And he’s solid. You can see the life experiences etched onto his weathered skin. Those calm, unassuming ways of his, it masks the severity of his words.

All I did was to nod as an acknowledgment to his statement,. I missed him, especially now. I need someone solid like him to drag me back to reality one that agrees it is worth the lifetime wait, instead of simply jumping on the wagon as all the other around seemed to be so interested in. That calm, unassuming way of his, it masks the severity of his words. No wonder he is still single.

Again, I miss him and I wish we could work on a project together. It would be good to work with a solid sounding old dude who’s far from being preachy. 

Shawal bakal datang lagi

Sudah lebih setengah bulan Ramadhan berlalu dan seperti tahun2 lepas waktu ini biasanya aku akan mula  tercari-cari alasan untuk menjawab soklan maut sedara mara makcik pakcik datuk nenek ‘kau bila nak kawen?’ selain sibuk membuat persiapan raya yang harus disiapkan. Waktu kenduri kawen sepupu di Kuantan baru2 ni  makcik, pakcik, kawan, sanak saudara dan jiran tetangga tanya pasal kawen. Waktu hari raya pun sama. (Bile aku nak kawen dgn Zul?)

But this year ...I wont be answering those ques......bagaimana dgn anda? Ini jawapan yg akan aku beri sekiranya aku berpeluang balik raya tahun ini.....

1.  Not enough money. – Aku sedang menabung untuk sambung buat Masters dan perlukan wang yg banyak.Lebih2 lagi bila teringat perbualan aku dgn mapa sebulan lebih yg lalu:

A few days after Kuantan Wedding.

Me :    Papa, I wanna do ES or maybe a second degree. 
Papa : Engineering Science ? Before you ever contemplating to have another certificate, you must get the RM 22.50 certificate. If not... no way!

Mama: I agree with your papa.

Me : *sigh*

Mas kawen di Johor RM 22.50 tp papa jgn lupe (sambil keluarkan kalkulator depan mama dan papa dan start buat kira kira belanja food, lodging, transportation, pakaian bla bla depan dorang bila aku masuk uni semula in AUD 250k ). Ade sape2 nak sponsor?  

Bile pakck makck atuk nenek tanya aku akan rekacipta sendiri hutang supaya nampak banyak hutang. Hutang kredit kad Platinum RM 1k sebulan, hutang kereta Calnina RM 3k sebulan untuk baki lagi 2 tahun, hutang beli kondo RM 2.5k sebulan untuk 20 tahun, hutang buat personal loan sebab  melancong RM 500 sebulan. Dan belum termasuk hutang budi lagi. Lantak.

Duit tu ade tapi tak cukup untuk nak kawen. Aku nak majlis paling grand sekali. Nak jadi Cindarella naik kete kuda ade a big pumpkin kat belakang, nak baju nikah design by Micheal Ong, nak baju bersanding design by Nizarman, pastu nak kawen kat hotel lima bintang, dekorasi dari pelamin, bilik sampai meja pengantin dengan tetamu semua nak fresh  yellow roses. Door gift untuk semua tetamu satu ipod touch . Persiapan kawen dari awal hingga akhir - mandi bunga kat spa, decor bilik tdo, mak andam, sure orang yang tanya tu cebik bibir dan terus turn off. Mama  nak aku kawen di Sydney  kan kan...

2.     Tak reti2 masak – Mak ngah kata “Kalau ko tak pandai masak takde orang nak nanti!”.

Jadi, gunakan alasan ini. Alasan ini memang padu.

Bila orang tanya  bila nak kawen, jawab: “Wehhhh aku nak guna dapur gas pun tak pandai . Masak nasik guna rice cooker tp kalau tetibe takde letrik?”

Lengkuas, daun kunyit, daun bawang, halia, ketumbar, jintan dan macam macam lagi semua aku belum kenalan lagi. Lelaki kan nak cari isteri yang pandai masak je. A’ah.

Belum bersedia – Hujah hujah yang lebih konkrit. Aku keje o/s paling lama enam bulan tak balik umah kalau cuti walaupun sebulan/ dua bulam nak tido berminggu2, kalau kawen sape nak uruskan rumah dan suami? Masak, basuh kain, lipat kain, kemas rumah. Aku tak pandai masak, dapat pulak suami cerewet yang tak mahu makan lauk recycle. Makan tengahari kena masak, makan malam nak lauk lain. Pastu mesti ade macam2 lauk, mampus aku. Bila masa aku nak rehat? Lebih2 lagi bulan puasa,  kena bangun sahur untuk masak?, masak lagi...... Grrrrr.

Kalau balik raya rumah mertua tak boleh balik raya lama lama jenuh  kena tolong masak rendang, lemang segala lauk pauk yang aku sendiri pun tak makan. Kena plak pakai baju sedondon  satu family Aku lebih suka custamized made especially design by Nizarman.. Belum kira duit raya lagi. Aku belum ade anak buah (anak tekak ade laaa...haha) Kalau la  anak buah suami 30 orang, anak sepupu, anak kawan2 . Rabak poket akuuuu.

Berdasarkan pemerhatian, kawan kawan aku yang dah kawen dan beranak pinak tak terurus terus jadi tak presentable, baju asal pakai, geloboh, warna dull, body tak jaga, lemak terkeluar sana sini. Kalau nak keluar kerja kena siapkan barang keperluan suami dulu laki plak pesyen kalau iron baju atau seluar, semua bucu nak tajam no double line, silap haribulan muka laki aku plak aku seterikakan sebab mengada-ngada. Hidup aku sendiri tak terurus macam mana nak uruskan hidup orang lain.

Kalau dah ade anak, bab tu aku jadi mengong.....Sape nak jaga? Mama selalu kena keje over sea dan papa? Ape alasan papa yea? Bole ke jaga anak bila mama enam bulan tak balik umah? Bab jadi papa dan mama ni yang paling rumit

3.    Suka kaum sejenis – Aku rasa alasan ni paling berkesan. Itu pun kalau aku tiba2 jadi berani nak bagi alasan ni . Kalau aku bagitau papa  aku suka kaum sejenis, penampar mesti naik ke muka aku

Yang sebenarnya belum masa lagi aku nak ada 'penyemak katil' atau menyemak atas katil orang laen.....