Thank you my love

Relationship involves letting someone sincerely into your life and into your heart. Sometimes it happens in a strange and tricky ways. Recollecting mine, it changed my attitude and headspace.

The past mostly has change my perspective about my own feelings in a lot of ways, made me feel uncertain and doubted my own abilities to maintain a good long live relationship. I've thought many times that I'm probably best off at being single, but that doesn’t always happen the way I thought or planned.

You can’t stop your heart from loving someone even while your mind won’t let you and sometimes you want to love someone but you are not capable to.

I am a think tank who thinks too much and has the tendency to overanalyze everything.

He said I always wanted things my way which blinded me and not see his point of view – It took me ten years to realize it and he's probably right.

It is difficult letting someone into my life who is entirely at odds with my entire way of thinking. We are so different and the smallest things triggered points of anger and we clash over things that I would have never considered to be significant in the past.

I have never considered myself to be unreasonable but our clashes highlighted the unbending nature of my personality.

With the next guy there is never a conflict because his thoughts are mostly the same way as mine and he had always given way to my needs and wants no matter how strange and expensive they could be.

Both made a comeback joining force with me to complete a mission to be accomplished in six months.

This is the first time I have experienced the tumultuous side of relationships, the turbulence of passion, the first time I have experienced such huge ranges of emotion.

I find myself giving in as my ego struggling against it and I am forced to reevaluate myself of what I want and of my own needs and the journey has been one that has opened my eyes to a lot of things.

This is a journey of many more journeys to come – some has been good, some bad, and I’m constantly reminded that some journeys are meant to be journeyed alone and some paths are best walked with another.

I suppose you are meant to walk with me.

Thank you my love. 

During Labour

 I could see two nurses and a doctor racing against time. 


I wanted to have a normal delivery but it wasn’t possible for me and the best way possible was by a C-Section (unplanned c-section)

Yes, childbirth is painful;

Being in pain does not mean a woman in labour need to overturn herself side to side on the bed. This will exhaust her of her energy, and lose the will and urge to push when it is truly needed.  When mothers exhaust themselves before time to push, it will endanger the baby.

I was in a lot of pain but my cervix wasn't fully open, and the doc estimated I would deliver in an hour. I was moaning in pain and when I started frantically overturning myself, I was immediately pegged and console by hubby as the delivery prolonged.

I was almost driven mad and was perspiring profusely despite hubby telling me to calm down. I feel that the delivery is too long and too painful, At the peak of my pain, the doctor sat me down and told me to listen to her.

She told me exactly what to do and how to push. I am to use the pain to push out the baby, and that it would be important to keep the push going right through the contractions. She told me what they were doing and why, and why I should conserve my energy throughout the process so I could focus totally on the labour.

When push came to shove, I focused and push but the baby stopped moving down the birth canal and attempts to stimulate contraction to get things moving again can’t worked.

That is when I was wheeled to the OT. I already had an epidural for pain relieve during labour and it would be used for the c-section as well but before surgery, I got an extra medication for complete numbness…….

A few hours later as I held him first time in my arms, I had to hold back my tears. There's something about bringing life into the world that becomes very emotional for me, the strength of a mother’s bond and her love during the unbearable pain of labour.

Yes, childbirth is painful

I wish for a normal delivery……(will, will, will and will…)

Selamat hari wanita... dr wanita utk wanita

Ladies…it is important to keep track of your periods because when it comes to pregnancy, it's all about dates - and the correct ones! 

So many things can go wrong during pregnancy, but these risks could be minimized by having proper follow up. I’ve read about a mother who delivered past her date and had to deliver a really big baby, and there are cases of intrauterine deaths (stillbirth) because of the lack of awareness regarding risk factors surrounding pregnancy. 

Being sure of your dates is essential and if you have your dates wrong, it means your estimated due date will be off. A lot of management revolves around the correct dates – and it could make a difference delivering a premature baby versus a term one. 

So ladies, remember your periods – try and write it down in a diary/phone. If you are of a childbearing age and sexually active, it is really important to be aware of things like these.  

Selamat Hari Wanita....