Tuesday 26 April 2011

NO PAIN NO GAIN


Are we less worthy of being a human if what propelled us to greater heights is motivated by extrinsic material rewards? Not in all circumstances..... example - how can you say your child is less worthy of a child if what motivates him to study hard and obtain good grades in his exam is a hand phone(hp)
But that was what I had been eyeing for........

Mommy being the not so generous mama, wont easily buy me a hp when I was twelve but said, ‘if you want it, you go get your 5As for UPSR.’

Handphone? UPSR!  5As! ....

I told mom i was too short to reach the public phone at school and argued I should have a hp if in case there was an emergency at school.

Mom rebuttal: Who ask you to be too choosy with your food? Eat a lot more so that you grow taller.Besides, if there’s an emergency go run to the teacher, canteen people, the lady cleaner, gardener, security guard or bus driver and shout  ‘ HELPPPPP…….’      (mama is mean.......)

‘But what if it's outside school ma….’ I tried still.

Mom rebuttals: What outside school? After school, you come right back home, straight home, in uncle Bakar's  van, you hear?!!   (She sounded  meaner.........).

After coming home from a school trip, I related an incident of my friend who lost his hp during that trip and he called his parent using another friend's hp and told me, "Mak aku kata tak per lah. Nanti dia ganti lain."(its ok I buy you a new phone)
I questioned mom, why was it that other parents could easily provide their children with hp and she could not?

Mom’s answer: Oh! If you want parents that could easily provide you with a hp, you could easily change parents! Go ask if they want to adopt you then maybe you can move to their house and ask them to buy you a hp. (Mom is cruel…sobsob)

Papa ……

It's not that we could not afford one and we don't care if others can easily provide their children with hp or other material rewards without demanding some achievement and set the bar as high as what we've set for you - you are my daughter. Tough luck! And as our dot, you've got to start learning from now on………
No pain, No gain!

And we want you to know we were not born into this world with silver spoons. Eating roti canai outside once in a blue moon was already a great childhood reward for us . You? You got to eat your favourite fast food so often without much Q&A. Be thankful.

But one thing you've got to learn, the world is not one holy charitable place. And since you may not be sheltering under our roof forever, you've got to knock this into your head, heart and mind: You want something? Work hard! Earn it with your own sweat and tears. Your own stripes and strides. The reward will taste much sweeter.

Challenge yourself to proof that you can do it, that you have what it takes, that you are not easily susceptible to negative influence and distraction for short term gratification. There is always light at the end of the tunnel, provided you move towards the end of it!

But the end does not justify the means. Don’t rob any bank……




*Sadly I hardly use the hp they bought me after UPSR….because I have to leave for a boarding school*

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