Lost

 

I have been sitting by the sea since 3 am, trying to regain the lost feeling known as peace. Not to say that I am constantly not at peace, but the sea has always been very important to me.It’s a place where I have both found peace and adventure. Unfortunately, since resigning from work to focus my attention more on expanding the family, I was relatively cut off from ‘ocean life’ and constant contact of the sea gradually is disappearing from my daily life.

It’s been wonderful to find peace of mind and tranquility just by sitting near the ocean again…the type of peace that I am referring now is that of zen nature (but I am not becoming a Buddhist) I was still in high school when I read about memory management and focus. It had always been easy then to simply just close my eyes and slip into my center and all is well.

But over the years with few tragic incidence that passed my life I am often alluded to the past and for the last few months with its increased intensity makes it harder and harder to just let go. The attachments have a strong foothold in my subconscious mind and it is sad that I don't know how to break them. 

The truth, I do know how, but I can't seem to get it working. 
It's as if my mind is fighting for control over itself. 
So I decided to take a break from everything.

I have been by the beach for the last two days alone. Zoul is supportive of this which made it easier for me to move,

Is it working?
I am not sure yet. 
But gradually I am seeing myself being more relax. 
The ocean has always had a calming effect on me. 
In another day I am going back home and review what I have accomplished. 
Until then I will just keep listening to the soothing sounds of the waves.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xDxWyLlo0w0