Tak mampu ku.....

 I have been in a crappy mood  and this lovely song seems to be in my mind most of the time. It  somehow reflect  how I am feeling  and how I should treat my  life at the moment. Taking one day at a time at my own pace. Hmm, am still wondering …may be it is the weather!

This song not only has a beautiful melody but the lyrics are pretty powerful too.

Berserah (Taufik Batisah)

Gerhana meliputi segala
Tiada lagi sinaran cahaya
Keinginan tanpa kepastian
Tak mampu rasanya ku teruskan
Ku meneruskan…

Biarlah ku relakan segala
Walau hidupku sebuah tanda tanya
Mengapa…
Biarpun tak mampuku bertahan
Tak akan pernahku akui kalah

Masih terdampar ku disini
Tiada jalan mungkinku lalui
Haruskah hidupku dipersenda
Mengharungi dugaan melanda
Ku berserah…

Biarlah ku relakan segala
Walau hidupku sebuah tanda tanya
Mengapa…
Biarpun tak mampuku bertahan
Tak akan pernahku akui kalah

Tuhanku ku relakan segala
Takkan pernahku akui kalah
Percayaku yakin padanya
Dia yang menentukan semua
Ku berserah…

Why u lost weight

This morning when I was at the clinic the doc said, “You lost weight” I smiled and said “yes, I know and you are not the first to tell me that!”
Before, it was Leodi, Mich and Joey asking me the same....

Leodi:  “Why you lost weight??”
Me: ......
I did not realize or feel the difference until it was pointed out to me.

Now to think of it, when it comes to sadness and matters of the heart/feelings, somehow or rather it would affect one’s physical. Nowadays, I eat for the sake of staying healthy but I do not binge more than the normal eating routine. Well what I can say, what a way to be losing weight….

Something To Cheer you Up......

Once upon a time, a man in a hot air balloon realized that he was lost. He reduced altitude and spotted a woman below. He descended a bit more and shouted. "Excuse me, can you help me ? I promised a friend I would meet him an hour ago, but I don't know where I am.

"The woman below replied. "You're in a hot air balloon hovering approximately 30 feet above the ground. You're between 50 and 51 degrees north latitude and between 114 and 115 degrees west longitude."

"You must be an engineer," said the balloonist.

"I am," replied the woman. "How did you know?"

"Well," answered the balloonist, "everything you told me is technically correct, but I've no idea what to make use of your information. The fact is, I'm still lost. Frankly, you've not been much help at all. If anything, you've delayed my trip."The woman below responded, "You must be in management."

"I am," replied the balloonist, "but how did you know?"

"Well," said the woman, "you don't know where you are or where you're going. You have risen to where you are due to a large quantity of hot air. You made a promise, which you've no idea how to keep, and you expect people beneath you to solve your problems. The fact is, you are in exactly the same position you were in before we met, but now, somehow, you've managed to make it my fault!!

That's what I call "Nature Selected Method"

 I was half asleep on the d/deck bed when I saw something interesting on the telly. It was actually a snippet on NatGeo of a 10 minute documentary that I have yet manage to watch in full. I have an hour more before the heli took off and ten minutes on telly is not gonna hurt anyone….hehehe.

The experiment involves 6 Caucasian women (they look Caucasian to me) with dissimilar immune system and biological make-up, as sampling size. Each of them was instructed to sleep while putting the same t-shirts on, for a few days in a row, without them taking any bath. ( I did not pay close attention on the number of days they have to put on the same shirt – it can't be 'that' long or the BO will become unbearable). 

The said t-shirts were then deposited and sealed in air-tight bags before placing them in the freezer.

A group of male volunteers were given the t-shirts at room temperature for ranking system in no particular order with 1 being the least like and 6 being the most like.

Like their female counterparts, the male were also tested to decode their immune systems. Tested from the scent being whiffed and sniffed, it can safely be concluded  which scent each man likes and they are attracted to  women with their corresponding compatible immune system. 

I found that conclusion quite interesting with its own set of ramifications:
1) Does it mean we are ‘innately’ and biologically attracted to persons of matching immune system? So beauty is skin deep, after all?
2) How do we explain on-the-surface factors? Personality, complexion, facial features, weight, height and what-have-you do not account for anything if we really plug into our primordial attraction to partners that are crucial for continuing our lineage and if may, ‘good breeding.’
3) If the same argument follows, when a partner becomes incapacitated by a disease or accident, will the other half  strayed and ‘prey’ on more healthy and bio-compatible candidates? Or will he/she waits faithful for a speedy recovery?
4) Does this explain why in some cases when one half of a couple dies, the other slowly withers and eventually passes away too soon after losing will to live during which his/her immune system takes a toll and inevitably declines. I notice this happens to couples that are so into one another and dedicate their lives to building a happy sustainable life together.

Of course this experiment has its limits and weaknesses. I wonder how it will be like if we are to rely on our elemental urges to choose our significant others in this I so called Nature Selected Method.

Do we need to change...?

So many things in life are changing. Sometimes it makes me wonder, do we need things to change…. or are we moving because we sincerely want to or you think it is due as others expect you to move on as well? Let's not get side tracked and jump the bandwagon. You might slowly breath changes into your life out cold and you will soon aware other things will start to change as well.

Changes tend to be for the better while some will smoothly slide down the drain. Relationships will be affected be it good or bad. Communications flows swiftly or in worst situation get confused /misunderstood in the middle. Friends may stay or go. People you think you have special connection with might just be another stranger in the midst.

Funny isn't it?.

Tapi tak apa....

I wanted to write, so much actually. But sometimes when I think of what I wanted to write was something that got to do with not a good news, I abandoned the urge to write.


Tapi tak apa. Here is a recipe for you......

Blueberry pie
Ingredients

• All-purpose flour, for dusting
• Pate Brisee
• 8 cups (about 4 pints) blueberries, picked over
• 1/2 cup sugar
• 1/4 cup cornstarch
• 1 tablespoon freshly squeezed lemon juice
• 2 tablespoons unsalted butter, cut into small pieces
• 1 large egg yolk
• 1 tablespoon heavy cream

Directions

1. On a lightly floured piece of parchment paper, roll out one disk of dough to a 12-inch round. With a dry pastry brush, sweep off excess flour; fit dough into a 9-inch glass pie plate, pressing it into edges. Trim dough to a 1/2-inch overhang all around. Fold edge of dough over or under, and crimp as desired. Roll out remaining dough in the same manner; transfer dough (on parchment) to a baking sheet. Chill pie shell and dough until firm, about 30 minutes.
2. Place blueberries in a large bowl; with your hands, crush about 1/2 cup of berries, letting them fall into the bowl as you work. Add sugar, cornstarch, and lemon juice; stir to combine. Spoon mixture into chilled pie shell, mounding berries slightly in the center. Dot with butter. Remove dough from refrigerator, and place over blueberry filling. Tuck edge of top dough between edge of bottom dough and rim of pan. Using your fingers, gently press both layers of dough along the edge to seal, and crimp as desired.
3. Using a paring knife, cut several vents in top of dough to allow steam to escape. In a small bowl, whisk together egg yolk and cream. Brush surface with egg wash, being careful not to let it pool. Freeze or refrigerate pie until firm, about 30 minutes. Meanwhile, preheat oven to 400 degrees, with rack in lower third.
4. Place pie on a parchment-lined baking sheet. Bake until crust begins to turn golden, about 20 minutes. Reduce oven temperature to 350 degrees. Continue baking, rotating sheet halfway through, until crust is deep golden brown and juices are bubbling and have thickened, 40 to 50 minutes more. Transfer pie to a wire rack to cool completely. The pie is best eaten the day it is baked, but it can be kept at room temperature, loosely covered with plastic wrap, for up to 2 days.

CNN or Reuters...

What would you feel when you are mocked and your statement being misunderstood??  If you ask me, I would say it all depends on my mood. If I am HAPPY, then I wouldn't mind. But if it’s ‘ time of the month’  or when I am miserable or depressed….Please DONT play fire with me…. .OK (in a very serious note).

O’Pete and O’Dave…….are great bullies and their target is always ME the only lady in the Group. (Aku mmg selalu dibuli oleh senior2 engineers yang tak senang duduk kalau tengok aku senyum2 kambing gembira. (O=old)

I was in the smoking room. I don't smoke but I was regularly there to hangout, socialize,and networking, (to cut off thinking of work temporarily) Seriously. If u were offshore and decided to stay in the cabin and cut off the world, in within three days you will jump the ocean to swim back to shore. Most probably you will end up resting peacefully in the jaw’s ridged, pointed irregular teeth before you ever reach the shore.     

Hehe….. hahaha

The smoking room was the nearest to the helipad and you could watch the heli taking off/landing. And you could watch the scene usually after the morning meet. When a heli is about to take off/landing all personnel are allowed to be at the open area. But no smoking there. There were about 11 people in the smoking room plus Pete. I was there an hour ealier and was about to move my butt when this old man started screaming at me.

He went like "Where are u going lady? Dont u know u r not allowed to go out while the chopper is here?" with a serious fierce looking face…and I looked at Mich and Joey one by one expecting them to say something in my defence. Mich? Joe? They were all silenced all of a sudden avoiding my gaze.. O’Pete is the company man…Noone dares say No..

(Diorang  buat muka toya sebab suma org pun takut dgn Pete si company man itu)

He continued " Please continue to be seated my lady… I bet civilization and after and stay blab la la……blab bla…".I hate that ol man…He was always making fun of me!

(Aku pun dgn muka takut dan masam duduk smula. Bila heli da bla dan si Ngok tu kuar the whole room gelakkan aku  sebab they knew  Pete was making fun 0f me. Kamu semua diam sebab Pete ialah company man kan?)

I was in the changing room. (It’s the room for keeping our working attires …boots, helmets etc and you get to change into them in the room before entering the main deck or the working area but it’s not like the changing rooms in those shopping malls) Thanks Encik Zul for forcing me to change into more sporty attires before flying here if not I would have worn my brand new rainbow crocs..I miss my crocs heels..

(Enam bulan aku mimpikan nak beli crocs tu....).

I was sliding my foot into the boots when suddenly I heard Dave laughing," Look at her socks! It's flowery and it's pink! " Damn.

Since that day the first thing that he'll look when we bumped into each other is to stare at my socks then made an announcement for all to know of my arrival…..

I gave a sweet smile and catwalk passed them all….more than twenty male spectators at a time.   

(Nak show? Meh aku bagi korang show lenggok gadis Melayu….hahahahaha. ari2 pun boley..)

I was sleeping in the accomodation when the rig manager came to the cabin. He went " Where is the lady in yellow?" and the guys told him that I was sleeping. Yes I was sleeping…nothing wrong with that since the night before I was on standby and didn’t sleep the whole night.

When I was on standby again the next night and Dave suddenly made an announcement with his provocative voice that really annoying…  "Oh the fairlady is awake. She's so lazy sleepin the whole afternoon….hahahaha"..

I was like….. (ko nak gatu semua org  yg aku adalah pemalas. Bongok ko Dave!)

I was in the Q for my dinner but when it was my turn to pick the food suddenly I lost appetite and walk through the Q, got myself a mug of hot choc got a seat and quietly watch the rest choosing and picking….. Pete was there. Leodi and Mich  sat next to me while I was sipping my drink... I went back to be in the Q when my belly started pounding and Pete intentionally blocked my way (he was on his way to the table) and said loudly" You are having your second round dear? U eat a lot my dear~"

(Sengaja kau gtau org d Galley yg aku kuat makan. Aku baru nak makan Ngokkk. It was not my second round pun)

(Aku Jadi malas nak mkn kat Galley) So I made a cup of hot choc and brought a bun into my accommodation. I bumped into Dave before reaching the cabin. He looked into my eyes…and I stared back at him. He said "U r sneaking food. That's not allowed!"  and I answered "It's not written that I cant eat in my cabin.".He added “ I'll come to ur cabin later."

(Gila ape org tua itu. Mesti baru minum beer ni.)

I said, “Of course….after I splash this hot choc on ur face.and a back kick on ur belly”.

I was chatting. He came into the internet room, acting like a PI he started to say loads..  "U dont even need to keep in touch with ur bf Nina. You are offshore. Come on. Njoy ur time while u r here,"

( Malas nak layan)

So I told him "I'm getting engaged. I am in touch with my fiance-to-be"

(Terdiam dia.Pastu ramai pulak yg tanya pasal my 'engagement'. Jatuh saham aku)

Leodi: You told Dave that we r getting engange Nina?

WTFFF…….

Me: NO. I think Dave will be better off if he is with the CNN or the Reuters….