Vital part of my past...

As on the 20th  this month my lexapro was reduced to 10mg from initially 15mg  intake.  So far no withdrawal effect, except the zapping feeling the moment I step out from the plane  or when I was on the helipad.

My mind and emotion are more stable these days. Whenever I miss ...... I will allow myself to cry max 10 mins and move on. Previously it was difficult to get a grip but now it is controllable.

Whenever things get too overwhelmed, I took Xanax or Valium, depending on how severe I felt – Valium is when I completely have nothing to do the next day.

Sadly, I still fail to retrieve some of my memories. Lots of things still remain fuzzy which is so frustrating.

In order to help my neuron growth,  I was on folic acid, b complex and omega 3  partly to boost my appetite :)

And writing in this blog  has helped me remember lots of things from the past. ...it's not amnesia but I just can't  recall vital part of my past., that’s all.

About love and selfishness

All this thinking about love and selfishness come about when we had tea together. She really pisses me and made me think of how selfish one can be when it comes to love. This was what transacted between us.

Me: So why are you angry?

Lyra : Im so mad with my boyfriend’s wife. She is so aggressive (ganas!), I have to keep the relationship under warps for now because she ( the wife) is upset with the whole affair.We do not see each other much now.

Me : But I would say  Lyra you are the aggressive one instead of her, since you are the one who is having an affair with a married man NOT her and the married man happens to be HER husband.

Lyra : yeah but she is still aggressive…I am so angry with her.


Me : Please find a single and available guy, avoid married man.

The conversation ended….I was fuming mad by the way she was venting out her frustrations. Wow… where is her conscience and surprisingly she is so full of herself that she did not even have the empathy for others. A person like her gives the single female population a bad reputation. I have heard too many cases of husbands leaving their kids and wives for other women. How can one be so blind by love?

Love alone is just not enough, character, personality, the heart and attributes that a person has are important. If she could fall/having affair with a married man who doesnt really care of the feelings of his wife and kids, would she feel secured and safe to be with? If he is not faithful to his wife, he could be unfaithful to her too right.

As for the love strucked husband, if she could totally ignore the sensitivity of his kids and wife by pulling  him away from the family, could she be trusted not to leave him for another man.


Oh well, what goes around comes around. I rest my case.

You got problem with that...

It was the first time in Blue Frog that I ever come across such … behaviour

I was putting away my stuff into my laptop bag…….

“Could you hurry up?” He asked me.  

His tone was commanding, arrogant, in an uncivilized even immoral way.

And I in my glorious stubborn bull headed attitude said;                                                                    “No.”

I calmly switched on my laptop despite my intention to leave. I called for a staff and ordered another hot chocolate, with a bag of chips, and another chocolate chip muffin.

“You not leaving?” He asked.

And again, I in my glorious stubborn bull headed attitude said;

“No. U got problem with that?”

The staff remain standing by beside me (he is Steven's brother), just in case it gets ugly. Annoyed,  he went back to his seat. He literally threw his drink on the table. He was muttering some swear words under his breath, possibly in Spanish.

Leodi and Sarah came in a few minutes after and asked if I am ready to go. I asked them to sit down and order something. The movie is only going to be in an hour.

Call me a creep or  whatever but you know, we sometimes do things in the moment, this is one of my ‘moments’. Besides, he is a rude prick, and rude pricks don’t get my respect and they most definitely don’t deserve it.

I could have given him the space if he was nice, smiling, and added the word ‘please’ at the end of his request. 

Prick!!.

To live....

 I got this powerful unwanted instinct but  I guess this is the way God want to show  me that  ALL PEOPLE CANT BE TRUSTED NO MATTER HOW LONG YOU KNOW THEM. 

Seeing is believing…..Thank you.

I wish God punishes  you for betraying me but no punishment in this world would compensate  to the pain I'm suffering because of you . Thank you. It really  hurts…..  This is the most extreme frustration I ever had that I swear  it will not happen again in future.

I am like a widow, who found out all of her dead husband's secrets. Like usual, if there was no proper closure, the woman's mind start being....presumable. I am trying my best to deal with it. To get it off my head. 

To Live.

Civilized mind....caring heart

I was pushing my trolley with both Billy and Sarah by my side when lady  A passed me in a rush  and  unintentionally ramp  her trolley into lady B who was standing at the side in front of me .  The wheels of the trolley hit one of lady B’s foot.  Lady A kept saying she was terribly sorry  but lady B was really fuming and start attacking lady A verbally, thinking that she ramp the trolley on purpose. The situation worsen when her family join in the argument and they becoming more  aggressive with cursing, screaming, swearing and saying the meanest things to lady A.  Lady B’s leg looked pretty okay to me and she was not even limping.. No major damages. Why are they behaving barbaric…

Lady A seem not too eager to create a big scene as she started pushing  her  trolley away and kept saying sorry repeatedly  and then left.  Oh boy, what happened next was like a trauma for me….( lady B, husband and son) came back searching  for lady A  from aisle to aisle and once they saw her, they ramp onto her with their trolley. Gosh!!! Talk about being sick!

Well, I have ramp my trolley onto someone unintentionally and someone has ramp his/her trolley onto mine …But  it was an accident, sometimes the wheels just gives way, aisles are too narrow. We don’t need to be nasty and bully others right?

I heard of road bullies but what do we call these sick people ….supermarket bullies? Oh and I was pretty upset when Leodi started to blame lady A for rushing  blindly while shopping.

It is not about doing things in a rush it is about having a civilized mind and a caring heart…..

Don't you think so...?

Palms reading...

Brian read my palm last year. What I remembered the most about the palm reading was when he said that help will always be around when I NEEDED ONE. True…

I always get help when I am broke, there’s always company when I am depressed and if I requested I will easily get a dose when I am sexually…kidding!

Love wise, it was vague. He said that he could be wrong  because I am attractive, and smart,  Anyone walking  the streets would notice me…lol!. This I shrugged off as a joke. I am not pretty, enigmatic maybe….

I might look like a piece of meat for dirty old man who love and will try to sink their teeth in, because I know basically, if they could not get into my head, they will try to  get into my pants.

Actually palms don’t tell you anything, and even if it does, it is not necessary for anyone to believe in.


I am warning you!

ballroom dance

When I was a kid I collected stamps, stickers, paper dolls, books, comics and I had my very own dried leaf collection in old exercise books too. There was a time when every kid in school were totally psyched over the feather phenomenon (we put a feather in our textbooks and ‘fed’ it with wooden pencil shavings. Back then you will have to be ‘kaya’ to own a mechanical pencil.).

I was an avid collector and  I was also the only artistically inclined in the family. I write short stories, I drew sketches and mama bought me a set of Buncho crayons for my ‘Masterpieces’.

Now, at the age of nearing 30.... (28) and personally, in a way, ‘sudah jadi kaya’, I lost touch with such hobbies, I still write, not short stories but I write, and sometimes, I sketched on my A5 size pads which I brought with me everywhere I go. I am having  a break from work for 10 days and am now currently  on a holiday with family, I am in  search for a ballroom dance class and I found one in La Xara. Thanks to Steven...

 I think, Salsa is good for the soul, and so is Tango.

VC

Vibrating condom??? 
Hmmmm........ spotted that at a Shell kiosk when I drive Sarah to drop off her lucky draw forms 

I was curious on how that works. If only the old man at the counter was not smiling at me when I was looking at it.....

It was in a pink box too

Bellarina.

Walking down memory lane is peculiar. It makes you think of odd and weird stuff. From time to time you bump into fraction and pieces of the past and experience it with  such a thrilling and warm emotion. And the past somehow sculpt you into the person you are now. If I could go back I wish to be a ballerina instead.

Anyway I am glad I turned out to be who I am right now as exactly I want my life to be not perfect but independent, I don’t have many kids in tow. I could still maintain an alluring sexy waistline till today and I don’t have to live in misery and eating my heart out living with a  cheating husband.

Am I supposed to be flattered that I look intimidating because I am more successful in my career or am I suppose to be more concern about how arrogant I look in the eyes of others..….. like your average bitch next door. Makcik2/ MIL to be loath me and I am unapproachable especially when I am at work.

Beats me. 

Bipolar Disorder

An old issue of the Oprah magazine caught my eyes and I got lost in my own reading land.The article was on bipolar disorder. A good info for me as I have never heard or read on bipolar disorder before. It is also defined as manic-depressive illness. A brain disorder that causes unusual changes in a person's mood, energy, and ability to function and it could be treated only if it is detected and diagnosed. The consequences of bipolar disorder could be failed relationships, marriages, poor school or job performance and even suicide. 

Wow, pretty scary don’t you think?

The symptoms of bipolar disorder are as follows:-

• Racing thoughts and talking very fast, jumping from one idea to another.
• Buying things you don’t need 
• Spending out of control
• Sleeping less and not missing any bit of it.
• Irritable and you shout too often or get yourself in arguments and fights
• Poor judgment
• Flying off the handle
• Very much into socialising
• Have trouble concentrating and focusing
• Feel too confident of yourself ( more tahn usual)

Most of the time, people do not realize that they are suffering from bipolar disorder. They could be suffering from it for many, many years when finally they are aware of it. It is said to be a long term illness, and it is a relief that it could be treated. I guess it helps if the symptoms or signs are detected at an early stage.

Pretty useful info and somehow disturbing to know that apart from those other depression issues we normally read or see, there are many other forms of mental illnesses. Sad when it robs off a person healthy and normal life?

Point 3 and 4 definitely give me the creeps…

What would you do..?

You sense there's "sparks" or chemistry between the two of you. You love to hang out together and you are together most of the time, you can confide in each other easily, BUT unfortunately this thing you have with him just does not seem to move beyond the “friends-zone”. Nothing seems to be developing. 

What would you DO??

1. Do you tell him how you feel? It could be one-sided.
2. Do you wait until he says something, or ask another friend *a third party) for assistance?
3. Do you give yourself a time frame, if nothing happens, forget the whole thing and move on…
4. Do you continue to be friends? Hoping that ONE day, he will change his mind and realise how much he likes/loves you?

 Well, it is never easy when it involves matters of the heart. The heart will tend to override the brain.

 I hope she will make the right decision.

Do You Know....?

What I would love to share here is the difference between a rig (pelantar gerudi) and a platform (pelantar). Most people are confused over these two terms. They point to 2 distinct items and each offering different function and offered different experiences on board each one of them. It’s not a place for the chicken heart. It spells work round the clock and you're stuck up there 24/7 for weeks or even months..

 An oil platform is referred to as an offshore platform. They are lonely beings. Once you've built and anchored a platform offshore, it stays there for the rest of its life. These platforms will support the wells, some processing facilities, and in many cases, the platform contains facilities to house the workforce as well.

Basically once it gets to a location, it will be grounded there, as opposed to a rig, where it is towed to where ever it is needed, and will move away once the job is done.

Depending on the circumstances, the platform may be fixed to the ocean floor, may consist of an artificial island, or may float.

Remote subsea wells may also be connected to a platform by flow lines and by umbilical connections; these subsea solutions may consist of single wells or of a manifold centre for multiple wells

Rigs are vessels which go poking around on the earth's surface, and leaves holes on them. Once enough holes are made, and information from the ground, or even a well is established, the rigs will move away to other locations, to poke more holes in the ground to get data of the earth surrounding the hole, or to make a hole worthy of producing black gold from the ground and  it is towed to where ever it is needed, and will move away once the job is done. 

Oil and natural gas drilling rigs can be used not only to identify geologic reservoirs but also to create holes that allow the extraction of oil or natural gas from those reservoirs. Primarily in onshore oil and gas fields once a well has been drilled, the drilling rig will be moved off of the well and a service rig (a smaller rig) that is purpose-built for completions will be moved on to the well to get the well on line. This frees up the drilling rig to drill another hole and streamlines the operation as well as allowing for specialization of certain services, i.e., completions vs. drilling.

Married or single...?

I totally agree that when one is married with kids, one is obviously tied down with various responsibilities and commitments.  Attending to the demand  and the needs of growing up  kids could burn you and is costly too.. But people should not generalize and judge others based on their marital status i.e single or married as some would believe the singles are always commitment free and they lead such a boring life!

But, has it ever occurred to them, that we lead our lives the way we want to and I believe many of us don’t go home and stare at four walls!  ( I wonder where she got the idea from?? Maybe she was staring at the four walls when she was single ) Believe me there are other better things to do than staring at the four bloody walls. Being single, just like being married, has it’s ups and downs. No one has the right to judge.

Married people do married things and single people will do things single people do. I have never seen anyone staring at four walls unless one is in a prison cell and let barking dogs lie.. not  worth  arguing.

To counter these comments - why are you not married yet? Don't you feel bored being single? blah blah blah……I usually tell them something like …. "I’m a lesbo.  My gf and I are heading for this party where we chill out, smoke pot and drink sangria all night long". That always shuts them up.

Single or married, we have different set of problems and happiness in our lives... it's mainly a matter of appreciating what we have when we have it, is what's important... :)

God arranged our life's path for a reason. Married, single, we're all the same.

Holding On – Taufik Batisa

My world is closing in I'm so alone 

The door is locked and nobody's home 
Desire is the key that I must own 
Emotions get me losing control 
I'm losing control 
But I know 
It's the way that I must live 
Even though 
It's so unclear, so unfair 
God I know 
There's a path for everyone 
I must believe and keep holding on 
I'm wishing I was somebody else 
This world left me all by myself 
Now why do they keep playing with my mind 
Trying to break me down trying to make me blind 
But I see 
Cuz I know 
It's the way that I must live 
Even though 
It's so unclear, so unfair 
God I know 
There's a path for everyone 
I must believe and keep holding on 
God I know 
There's a path for everyone 
I must believe and keep holding on 
Never let my fears conquer me 
Cuz I know in my heart what I can be 
Holding on

Hopeful tots....

I really admire those who have been in the working force for many years and they could still show unending excitement as when they knew the day they got the job and was as eager and as ambitious as they started work on day ONE.  I wonder where they got all the drive and energy to avidly giving good end results working under the same organization for thirty or even more years…

My Daddy work at  irregular hours and so does my Mommy ( with diff skills). They had been working in the same work pattern for more than 30 years but each time they spoken of their job, there’s always that satisfaction LOOK on their faces. I wish I can be just like them! That is why we need to fall in love with our job and gradually developed a particular passion that will always burn inside with continued drive to excel and to perform at the level best.

Sigh!

Where are those passion and drive ?? It’s like…suddenly it was all gone and I am becoming more like a zombie lately. I think it is time for me to sit and think seriously about my career path. Will I be in the same industry for the next 5 or 10 years more? Or shall I …..

These three weeks has been work, work, work, eat and sleep.

I am counting my days for the coming Saturday, there will be a family gathering in Spain.  There will be a combined birthday bash for all the August, September and October BIG babies of the family.

I wish when I start work after the break, things will be better...

Tak mampu ku.....

 I have been in a crappy mood  and this lovely song seems to be in my mind most of the time. It  somehow reflect  how I am feeling  and how I should treat my  life at the moment. Taking one day at a time at my own pace. Hmm, am still wondering …may be it is the weather!

This song not only has a beautiful melody but the lyrics are pretty powerful too.

Berserah (Taufik Batisah)

Gerhana meliputi segala
Tiada lagi sinaran cahaya
Keinginan tanpa kepastian
Tak mampu rasanya ku teruskan
Ku meneruskan…

Biarlah ku relakan segala
Walau hidupku sebuah tanda tanya
Mengapa…
Biarpun tak mampuku bertahan
Tak akan pernahku akui kalah

Masih terdampar ku disini
Tiada jalan mungkinku lalui
Haruskah hidupku dipersenda
Mengharungi dugaan melanda
Ku berserah…

Biarlah ku relakan segala
Walau hidupku sebuah tanda tanya
Mengapa…
Biarpun tak mampuku bertahan
Tak akan pernahku akui kalah

Tuhanku ku relakan segala
Takkan pernahku akui kalah
Percayaku yakin padanya
Dia yang menentukan semua
Ku berserah…

Why u lost weight

This morning when I was at the clinic the doc said, “You lost weight” I smiled and said “yes, I know and you are not the first to tell me that!”
Before, it was Leodi, Mich and Joey asking me the same....

Leodi:  “Why you lost weight??”
Me: ......
I did not realize or feel the difference until it was pointed out to me.

Now to think of it, when it comes to sadness and matters of the heart/feelings, somehow or rather it would affect one’s physical. Nowadays, I eat for the sake of staying healthy but I do not binge more than the normal eating routine. Well what I can say, what a way to be losing weight….

Something To Cheer you Up......

Once upon a time, a man in a hot air balloon realized that he was lost. He reduced altitude and spotted a woman below. He descended a bit more and shouted. "Excuse me, can you help me ? I promised a friend I would meet him an hour ago, but I don't know where I am.

"The woman below replied. "You're in a hot air balloon hovering approximately 30 feet above the ground. You're between 50 and 51 degrees north latitude and between 114 and 115 degrees west longitude."

"You must be an engineer," said the balloonist.

"I am," replied the woman. "How did you know?"

"Well," answered the balloonist, "everything you told me is technically correct, but I've no idea what to make use of your information. The fact is, I'm still lost. Frankly, you've not been much help at all. If anything, you've delayed my trip."The woman below responded, "You must be in management."

"I am," replied the balloonist, "but how did you know?"

"Well," said the woman, "you don't know where you are or where you're going. You have risen to where you are due to a large quantity of hot air. You made a promise, which you've no idea how to keep, and you expect people beneath you to solve your problems. The fact is, you are in exactly the same position you were in before we met, but now, somehow, you've managed to make it my fault!!

That's what I call "Nature Selected Method"

 I was half asleep on the d/deck bed when I saw something interesting on the telly. It was actually a snippet on NatGeo of a 10 minute documentary that I have yet manage to watch in full. I have an hour more before the heli took off and ten minutes on telly is not gonna hurt anyone….hehehe.

The experiment involves 6 Caucasian women (they look Caucasian to me) with dissimilar immune system and biological make-up, as sampling size. Each of them was instructed to sleep while putting the same t-shirts on, for a few days in a row, without them taking any bath. ( I did not pay close attention on the number of days they have to put on the same shirt – it can't be 'that' long or the BO will become unbearable). 

The said t-shirts were then deposited and sealed in air-tight bags before placing them in the freezer.

A group of male volunteers were given the t-shirts at room temperature for ranking system in no particular order with 1 being the least like and 6 being the most like.

Like their female counterparts, the male were also tested to decode their immune systems. Tested from the scent being whiffed and sniffed, it can safely be concluded  which scent each man likes and they are attracted to  women with their corresponding compatible immune system. 

I found that conclusion quite interesting with its own set of ramifications:
1) Does it mean we are ‘innately’ and biologically attracted to persons of matching immune system? So beauty is skin deep, after all?
2) How do we explain on-the-surface factors? Personality, complexion, facial features, weight, height and what-have-you do not account for anything if we really plug into our primordial attraction to partners that are crucial for continuing our lineage and if may, ‘good breeding.’
3) If the same argument follows, when a partner becomes incapacitated by a disease or accident, will the other half  strayed and ‘prey’ on more healthy and bio-compatible candidates? Or will he/she waits faithful for a speedy recovery?
4) Does this explain why in some cases when one half of a couple dies, the other slowly withers and eventually passes away too soon after losing will to live during which his/her immune system takes a toll and inevitably declines. I notice this happens to couples that are so into one another and dedicate their lives to building a happy sustainable life together.

Of course this experiment has its limits and weaknesses. I wonder how it will be like if we are to rely on our elemental urges to choose our significant others in this I so called Nature Selected Method.

Do we need to change...?

So many things in life are changing. Sometimes it makes me wonder, do we need things to change…. or are we moving because we sincerely want to or you think it is due as others expect you to move on as well? Let's not get side tracked and jump the bandwagon. You might slowly breath changes into your life out cold and you will soon aware other things will start to change as well.

Changes tend to be for the better while some will smoothly slide down the drain. Relationships will be affected be it good or bad. Communications flows swiftly or in worst situation get confused /misunderstood in the middle. Friends may stay or go. People you think you have special connection with might just be another stranger in the midst.

Funny isn't it?.

Tapi tak apa....

I wanted to write, so much actually. But sometimes when I think of what I wanted to write was something that got to do with not a good news, I abandoned the urge to write.


Tapi tak apa. Here is a recipe for you......

Blueberry pie
Ingredients

• All-purpose flour, for dusting
• Pate Brisee
• 8 cups (about 4 pints) blueberries, picked over
• 1/2 cup sugar
• 1/4 cup cornstarch
• 1 tablespoon freshly squeezed lemon juice
• 2 tablespoons unsalted butter, cut into small pieces
• 1 large egg yolk
• 1 tablespoon heavy cream

Directions

1. On a lightly floured piece of parchment paper, roll out one disk of dough to a 12-inch round. With a dry pastry brush, sweep off excess flour; fit dough into a 9-inch glass pie plate, pressing it into edges. Trim dough to a 1/2-inch overhang all around. Fold edge of dough over or under, and crimp as desired. Roll out remaining dough in the same manner; transfer dough (on parchment) to a baking sheet. Chill pie shell and dough until firm, about 30 minutes.
2. Place blueberries in a large bowl; with your hands, crush about 1/2 cup of berries, letting them fall into the bowl as you work. Add sugar, cornstarch, and lemon juice; stir to combine. Spoon mixture into chilled pie shell, mounding berries slightly in the center. Dot with butter. Remove dough from refrigerator, and place over blueberry filling. Tuck edge of top dough between edge of bottom dough and rim of pan. Using your fingers, gently press both layers of dough along the edge to seal, and crimp as desired.
3. Using a paring knife, cut several vents in top of dough to allow steam to escape. In a small bowl, whisk together egg yolk and cream. Brush surface with egg wash, being careful not to let it pool. Freeze or refrigerate pie until firm, about 30 minutes. Meanwhile, preheat oven to 400 degrees, with rack in lower third.
4. Place pie on a parchment-lined baking sheet. Bake until crust begins to turn golden, about 20 minutes. Reduce oven temperature to 350 degrees. Continue baking, rotating sheet halfway through, until crust is deep golden brown and juices are bubbling and have thickened, 40 to 50 minutes more. Transfer pie to a wire rack to cool completely. The pie is best eaten the day it is baked, but it can be kept at room temperature, loosely covered with plastic wrap, for up to 2 days.

CNN or Reuters...

What would you feel when you are mocked and your statement being misunderstood??  If you ask me, I would say it all depends on my mood. If I am HAPPY, then I wouldn't mind. But if it’s ‘ time of the month’  or when I am miserable or depressed….Please DONT play fire with me…. .OK (in a very serious note).

O’Pete and O’Dave…….are great bullies and their target is always ME the only lady in the Group. (Aku mmg selalu dibuli oleh senior2 engineers yang tak senang duduk kalau tengok aku senyum2 kambing gembira. (O=old)

I was in the smoking room. I don't smoke but I was regularly there to hangout, socialize,and networking, (to cut off thinking of work temporarily) Seriously. If u were offshore and decided to stay in the cabin and cut off the world, in within three days you will jump the ocean to swim back to shore. Most probably you will end up resting peacefully in the jaw’s ridged, pointed irregular teeth before you ever reach the shore.     

Hehe….. hahaha

The smoking room was the nearest to the helipad and you could watch the heli taking off/landing. And you could watch the scene usually after the morning meet. When a heli is about to take off/landing all personnel are allowed to be at the open area. But no smoking there. There were about 11 people in the smoking room plus Pete. I was there an hour ealier and was about to move my butt when this old man started screaming at me.

He went like "Where are u going lady? Dont u know u r not allowed to go out while the chopper is here?" with a serious fierce looking face…and I looked at Mich and Joey one by one expecting them to say something in my defence. Mich? Joe? They were all silenced all of a sudden avoiding my gaze.. O’Pete is the company man…Noone dares say No..

(Diorang  buat muka toya sebab suma org pun takut dgn Pete si company man itu)

He continued " Please continue to be seated my lady… I bet civilization and after and stay blab la la……blab bla…".I hate that ol man…He was always making fun of me!

(Aku pun dgn muka takut dan masam duduk smula. Bila heli da bla dan si Ngok tu kuar the whole room gelakkan aku  sebab they knew  Pete was making fun 0f me. Kamu semua diam sebab Pete ialah company man kan?)

I was in the changing room. (It’s the room for keeping our working attires …boots, helmets etc and you get to change into them in the room before entering the main deck or the working area but it’s not like the changing rooms in those shopping malls) Thanks Encik Zul for forcing me to change into more sporty attires before flying here if not I would have worn my brand new rainbow crocs..I miss my crocs heels..

(Enam bulan aku mimpikan nak beli crocs tu....).

I was sliding my foot into the boots when suddenly I heard Dave laughing," Look at her socks! It's flowery and it's pink! " Damn.

Since that day the first thing that he'll look when we bumped into each other is to stare at my socks then made an announcement for all to know of my arrival…..

I gave a sweet smile and catwalk passed them all….more than twenty male spectators at a time.   

(Nak show? Meh aku bagi korang show lenggok gadis Melayu….hahahahaha. ari2 pun boley..)

I was sleeping in the accomodation when the rig manager came to the cabin. He went " Where is the lady in yellow?" and the guys told him that I was sleeping. Yes I was sleeping…nothing wrong with that since the night before I was on standby and didn’t sleep the whole night.

When I was on standby again the next night and Dave suddenly made an announcement with his provocative voice that really annoying…  "Oh the fairlady is awake. She's so lazy sleepin the whole afternoon….hahahaha"..

I was like….. (ko nak gatu semua org  yg aku adalah pemalas. Bongok ko Dave!)

I was in the Q for my dinner but when it was my turn to pick the food suddenly I lost appetite and walk through the Q, got myself a mug of hot choc got a seat and quietly watch the rest choosing and picking….. Pete was there. Leodi and Mich  sat next to me while I was sipping my drink... I went back to be in the Q when my belly started pounding and Pete intentionally blocked my way (he was on his way to the table) and said loudly" You are having your second round dear? U eat a lot my dear~"

(Sengaja kau gtau org d Galley yg aku kuat makan. Aku baru nak makan Ngokkk. It was not my second round pun)

(Aku Jadi malas nak mkn kat Galley) So I made a cup of hot choc and brought a bun into my accommodation. I bumped into Dave before reaching the cabin. He looked into my eyes…and I stared back at him. He said "U r sneaking food. That's not allowed!"  and I answered "It's not written that I cant eat in my cabin.".He added “ I'll come to ur cabin later."

(Gila ape org tua itu. Mesti baru minum beer ni.)

I said, “Of course….after I splash this hot choc on ur face.and a back kick on ur belly”.

I was chatting. He came into the internet room, acting like a PI he started to say loads..  "U dont even need to keep in touch with ur bf Nina. You are offshore. Come on. Njoy ur time while u r here,"

( Malas nak layan)

So I told him "I'm getting engaged. I am in touch with my fiance-to-be"

(Terdiam dia.Pastu ramai pulak yg tanya pasal my 'engagement'. Jatuh saham aku)

Leodi: You told Dave that we r getting engange Nina?

WTFFF…….

Me: NO. I think Dave will be better off if he is with the CNN or the Reuters….